Article written for Volume 3, Issue 4 of ‘Luminous Wisdom: Sophia’ (a Sibella Publications magazine).
The word Grief is one of avoidance to many people because it invokes a picture of inescapable pain. Nonetheless we all at times, feel the deepest grief and the widest oceans of loss. Any losses are all great cries to our Soul. We are rendered unable to function well and spend much time in and out of heartache. Grief is something that we all experience and cannot run from.
We have learned how to fear it and dread it, developing behaviours that are very practiced at avoiding this topic. It is of course uncomfortable and exhausting while we learn tactics for negotiating the strangeness of this distasteful emotion. We can’t seem to tame it nor change it for Grief has a mind of its own.
My own story of deep personal losses involved a time of great confusion and anguish. I searched to discover what could be gained from these challenging events. The exquisite pain and sense of hopelessness is indeed shattering on all levels and I’m not going to sugar coat that simple fact. It hurts. It aches. The holes of blackness within our chests do not just go away. There is a long process involved here that requires strength, courage, many unwanted tears and a myriad of complex ping pong like emotions.
Yet, what if there is purpose to everything we experience? What if this painful experience was a positive life changer for you and made a difference? What if you discovered that destiny was involved in your story and it became the instigation of powerful transformation for yourself and others? Perhaps the cause of your heartache has taken you to heights you would never have reached before. There are many ways, big and small of bringing about change which help us to assimilate our pain in healthy ways and give service in the name of our pain. I discovered that grief is our greatest learning tool for finding the most profound levels of ourselves. Experiencing loss is very often the kick off space for the most wonderful wisdom you can ever imagine.
Your pain provides growth of a place within yourself that you can develop and take refuge in when needed. A healthy, wise and loving space that begins to answer your questions and respond to your confusion or anger. I look back over the last few years and see how much I have changed for the better. I give a purer love and warmer service to others, feel wiser and yes, even nicer than I was before. I have discovered so much about myself. I have been shot across the Universe and back in order to discover what Real Life is about and learned that I can offer something useful to others and be so much more to myself. I encourage you to consider what purpose you might find within your experience.
Perhaps you too will find the gifts the Universe has granted you.